


i need you in my arms like the beating of my heart

by doiebites



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, mature warning for the first scene only
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-24
Updated: 2020-05-24
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:35:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24359674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doiebites/pseuds/doiebites
Summary: Six months passed since the last time they had slept in the same bed, and it was the last time Doyoung heard him say he loved him.
Relationships: Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung/Nakamoto Yuta
Comments: 3
Kudos: 91





	i need you in my arms like the beating of my heart

**Author's Note:**

> an extra warning in case you didn't read the tags, the mature warning is just for the start of this.

_ The atmosphere inside the bedroom was heavy, steamy. Heavy breathing, loud moans and cries filled it up, more and more intensely along with steady bed creaking.  _

_ Yuta slowed down his pace for a moment, trying to control himself. He felt himself close to his orgasm, his boyfriend’s cries of his name and moaning not helping.  _

_ Doyoung whimpered and whined when he stopped, moving his hips and begging him to keep going. He wrapped his legs around the older’s hips, pulling him closer. A louder moan left his lips when he felt him get deeper inside as a result. _

_ “Please…” _

_ Yuta smirked as he felt him pull on his hair, desperate for more. Teasing him, he kissed his neck, slowly and making sure it would leave a mark afterwards. It helped him steady himself, and as soon as he felt he was ready, he suddenly started thrusting, hard and slow.  _

_ “Is this what you wanted, baby?” he murmured in a low voice, kissing his jaw. _

_ Doyoung didn’t answer, grabbing his pillow and yelling out his pleasure. He could barely speak, only cursing or calling out his name which caused Yuta to go even harder. Seeing his boyfriend’s expression was driving him crazy, and he knew he was going to cum very soon with his rhythm. _

_ And as he expected, after a few hard thrusts the younger suddenly pulled on his hair hard enough to hurt him, letting out a longer moan, and he felt his cum all over both their torsos. It was a strong orgasm, and that along with the feeling he tightened up around his cock was too much for him to resist. _

_ He barely had time to say something before he came inside him, slowing down his thrusts until he was fully satisfied. _

_ Doyoung quickly pulled him down to kiss him, softening it up as they both started to relax. Yuta kissed his neck again, slowly turning them around so his boyfriend laid on top. _

_ “I love you.”  _

_ The older smiled in his sudden tiredness, caressing his cheek. _

_ “I love you more, baby.” _

  
  
  
  
  


Six months passed since the last time they had slept in the same bed, and it was the last time Doyoung heard him say he loved him.

Things started to go down in their relationship when Doyoung got his job in an office right after they finished college. It wasn’t bad at first, they were both excited about the opportunity, and Yuta even boasted about it to their friends, that his boyfriend was so talented he didn’t waste time in landing a job. They bought a house with his new high salary, and a few months later Yuta was the one to find a job offer, and even if nervous about it, Doyoung’s support helped him. For two years things were smooth sailing between them, at one point even considering marriage in the future.

Then Doyoung got a promotion.

It was great, and boosted his ego, and of course his wallet too. But that also brought him more work, and his schedules got more and more packed. And the pressure on him worsened, made him stressed, and snappy too.

Yuta understood it all at first, he really did. He tried his best to support him, to hear his rants when he came home tired, he even dealt with his bad moods and knew when to not disturb him. But it was all tiring for him, especially when he had his own job and he felt like he couldn’t destress and talk about it with Doyoung without him complaining and saying he got it worse than him. It felt like competition, he felt that he had lost his boyfriend’s support. 

After a few months, Doyoung was offered yet again another promotion, but this time, it would make him leave to another office. Almost at the other side of the country.

Yuta thought he would decline it right away, but to his shock - and disappointment - he asked some time to think about it. And that’s when things started to derail.

He couldn’t accept that Doyoung was seriously thinking about going for it. He couldn’t accept he was taking his job above their relationship. They had a lot of fights over that, and even though he ended up not accepting it in the end, it made them more distant.

Doyoung knew this was his fault. Seeing Yuta be progressively colder hurt him, and he felt guilty. He wanted to make things better, but work just didn’t let him take a break long enough for anything to work. He felt like he was juggling both things lately, and was close to losing everything.

And then one night, things fell apart.

Doyoung had a terrible day at work, and came home to find Yuta making dinner for them. It was a sweet move, and honestly the most domestic they’ve been in months. But his stress made him snappy again, and it sparked another fight. Their biggest one.

Yuta accused him of being arrogant and not caring about anything other than his job, and that he didn’t see a reason to continue to be there anymore because of that. And even though Doyoung apologized, tried to calm both of them down so they could talk and he could say everything that was stuck inside him since then, the older didn’t listen.

“I’m done, Doyoung. I’m leaving, I can’t be with someone that doesn’t love me anymore.”

“Yuta, wait, please!”

Doyoung only heard the front door closing loudly, and as he fell on the couch, tears of regret started to come out. 

  
  
  
  


Yuta regretted what he said the moment he got to his car, but his pride pushed him to keep going. He threw his phone to the passenger seat, ignoring Doyoung’s calls, and drove for over an hour, thinking about everything in those past months.

He knew he had a valid reason for his anger, for the pain he felt, but seeing Doyoung look guilty and apologize so sincerely made him think, for the first time in months, that he might have been wrong about his boyfriend’s attitude. And, he had to admit, he didn’t let him get much close lately either. 

Taking a turn, he drove to Taeil’s house, needing a second opinion and his mutual friend would be the best choice for advice.

  
  
  


“It’s late, Yuta. What happened?”

“Doyoung and I had a fight.”

Taeil sighed. “Again?”

Yuta sat down on the couch next to him, looking down at his hands. “This time it was worse.”

“How so?”

“I snapped.” he turned to look at his friend. “I told him everything that was stuck in my throat these past months, I accused him of everything, I… I said I didn’t love him anymore.”

“And did you mean it?”

The younger swallowed hard and shook his head, trying to contain his tears.

“It’s so hard, Taeil. This shit has been going for a year now, and everyday feels like it’s getting worse. Doyoung is always buried in his work, he barely talks to me, it’s like he doesn’t care anymore. I’m just so tired of all of this. I think this is the end for us.”

“The two of you have always been the worst at communication. If you said what you tell me to each other instead you wouldn’t be stuck in this situation.”

Silence fell between them, and Yuta looked at his friend to see him biting his lip in distress and avoiding his eyes, like he knew something he didn’t and couldn’t tell.

“What is it, Taeil? What are you not telling me?”

He sighed again. 

“I was supposed to keep this a secret, but seeing as you’re gonna ruin it before it happens, I might as well say it.”

Taeil turned to look at him in the eyes as he explained everything.

“You know how Doyoung is with his emotions. He might look distant to you, but he was suffering just as much as you all this time. And he wanted to make things right between you again. He’s been talking to me a lot, he told me about your fights and how much it hurt him. And he told me he was gonna ask for two weeks off so he could be with you. He was gonna buy plane tickets so you could go somewhere new, and try to start over in those days so you could go back to what you were. He wanted it to be a surprise. He loves you so much, Yuta. He was so terrified of losing you he didn’t even know where to start to change everything.”

The boy closed his eyes as he processed everything, realizing the mess they had gotten in. If only he had spoken to him, told him what he felt, they could have avoided most of this. 

“Yuta, go back home. Go talk to him, you both need to clear things out.”

“Thank you, Taeil. I think you just saved us.”

“If I knew it was gonna end up like this I’d have told you a long time ago.”

After promising to reward his friend for it he left, going back to his car and seeing the messages he received. And when he read the last one, he immediately drove off, to fix things once and for all.

**_“Yuta, please come back home.”_ **

**_“I’m so sorry. About everything.”_ **

**_“Please. I’m not going to sleep till you come home.”_ **

**_“I love you so much. Give me a chance, I’m begging. I don’t wanna lose you, not like this…”_ **

  
  
  


Doyoung was still on the couch staring at nothing when he heard the door open.

He immediately jumped to his feet, trembling as he waited for Yuta to enter the room. He didn’t know what to do, but he was tired of all the screaming, all the fights, and one way or another he was gonna tell him everything.

When he walked inside, he didn’t look angry anymore. 

Yuta stopped at the doorway and leaned against the frame, looking just as nervous as him. He could tell he had been crying as well, and that only made him feel more guilty. He could have avoided this, but waited till it was too late now.

“I’m so sorry-”

“No, Doie. I’m the one who’s sorry.”

Hearing him call him by his nickname after all this time brought tears back to his eyes, but he fought them.

“I went to Taeil, and he told me everything. He told me about your plan. All this time I thought you didn’t give a shit about me anymore, that you had given up on us, and you were honestly doing more than me to fix things up.”

“This is all my fault.”

“No it’s not.” Yuta walked inside the room and stopped right in front of his boyfriend. “It’s not your fault at all.”

“This all started because I got that offer and didn’t think about you.”

“We were both stressed out and fucking things up before that. It all happened too quickly, there were too many changes in our lives for us to process at the same time. And I overreacted that time, I was selfish and should have seen your side.”

“I should have never gotten that job…”

A tear rolled down his cheek, and he shook when he felt Yuta’s hand on his face, swiping the tear away slowly. It was the most intimate they had been in months, and he had missed his touch so badly it was almost overwhelming.

The older was shaking as well, but his voice was steady and sincere as he spoke.

“You did the right thing in accepting it, Doie. And I’m still as proud of you as I was back then. Don’t beat yourself up about it, we both got fault in this, and we’re gonna fix this together.”

Doyoung closed his eyes, feeling his thumb lightly brushing his cheek. He let out a sigh of relief, relief that things were finally looking up for a change, that they finally had a chance to go back to being happy again.

And then, he felt Yuta’s lips on his own.

The touch was so light and hesitant, it felt like it was their first kiss. He was waiting for a reaction, something that showed him it was okay to do it. And he gave it by kissing back, slowly and just intensely enough to show how much he missed his taste.

“You know,” Yuta said before stealing another kiss, “that surprise plan of yours sounds real good right now. But do you know what sounds better?”

“What?”

“Going to bed and sleeping with you in my arms again.”

Yuta grabbed his boyfriend’s hand and guided them to the bedroom upstairs. He slept in his underwear, so he waited for the younger to dress up and crawl to his spot in bed. He noticed how Doyoung shyly looked at his uncovered chest, a light pink tint creeping up on his cheeks. He looked adorable when he was flustered, and he was glad he could see it again, because he felt himself falling in love with the boy all over again.

“Come on, don’t act like it’s the first time you’re seeing me half naked.” he teased.

“It’s been long since the last time.”

“It has. Too long.” Yuta opened his arms. “Now get in.”

Doyoung gladly did as told, getting under the covers and letting Yuta pull him close to his chest. He instantly relaxed, sighing. His arms have always been his safe place, it gave him the security he needed, and right now he needed it all, he needed the feeling of being loved again.

“I missed this.”

“I missed it too.” The older stroked his hair, closing his eyes. “I missed you so much.”

“I love you.”

Anxiety rose after he said it, not knowing if his boyfriend would say it back. But he felt him tightening his embrace, and kiss the top of his head, and he relaxed again, knowing he’d hear the words he longed for for so long again after all this time.

“I love you more. And I will until the day I die. I promise.”


End file.
